My Way Parody

The same guy who had me write his best man speech at the Jewish wedding in my other work sample later asked me to rewrite the lyrics to My Way. I was given the following material:

• We offered to take Dad to Vegas, Tahoe, even Hawaii, but he didn’t want to go.
• He spent most of his professional life in the garment business.
• He gave the worst wedding toast in history at my wedding…mentioning stomach problems and toilet paper…enough said
• He has a second career as a stock broker, he is the worst record keeper out there, think graph paper instead of Excel My brother [nicknamed Roxy] is a sportscaster and is obviously dad’s favorite child…every time I speak with him he asks if I was my brother doing the game on TV last night
• He is very stubborn and always thinks the worst. He sees almost every movie released and all of them are just “OK”. * He loves a great meal, a caesar salad from Hy’s, and caramel sauce.
• If you ask him how he’s doing he’ll always respond with “fair” or “I don’t feel great”.
• He has a girlfriend named Ann who we all love. She would marry him tomorrow but he has no interest in getting married again
  
  I wrote up a version and then was asked to make revisions with the following details:
• 6 grand kids and one grand dog, Kona.
• A line or two on the Orient/Hong Kong in the garment portion of the song.
• The Roxy section is on the right track but I want to get away from the “be more like Roxy” and change it to him bragging about Roxy.
• I’d like to change “you’re life’s been OK to…so far, you’re life’s been OK. It sounds a bit morbid the other way!

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It is very important to me that I follow strict Weird Al-style rules for song parodies, where, as much as possible, the parody lyrics must be in the same rhythm as the original song. The commas in the song indicate where Frank Sinatra pauses when he sings the song.

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First Version
And now, we’re gathered here,
To honor you, our dear curmudgeon
My Dad, I’ll sing it clear
I’ll sing it bad, of this I’m certain
You’ve lived a life that’s full
You even drove, fast on a highway
And so, to sum it up
Your life’s been okay

Garments, you’ve sold a few
But then again, too few to mention
Then you, took up a new trade, trading stocks, with one slight problem
You can’t, manage Excel; paper abounds, a messy display
Go back, to schmatta Dad
Your life’s been okay

Now, there are times, you say to me,
Would it hurt you, to be like Roxy
I know my sports! I know them all!
From icy puck, to dribbleball!
I touched a down! I goaled a score!
Your life’s been okay!

My Dad’s, a man of taste
Caramel sauce, a salad from Hy’s
All else, is ‘eh’ or ‘waste’
Except for Ann, she’s quite the prize
I think you should get hitched
Get her a ring – so says Beyonce
Give up, this bachelor life
Your life’s been okay

So here’s to you Dad! My favorite guy!
My favourite grouch, still young and spry!
I know this song, is not for you!
Your wedding toast, was awful too!
Everyone here, let’s give a cheer!
Your life’s been okay!
Yes, it’s been okay!

Revised Version (just the first 3 verses have changed)
And now, we’ve gathered here
To honor you, our dear curmudgeon
My Dad, I’ll sing it clear
But surely worse, than the grandchildren
Kona, best dog around
If she could sing, I’m sure she’d say
Bark Bark, Yelp Yelp Ruff SQUIRREL!
Your life is okay

Garments, you’ve sold a few
But then again, too few to mention
You flew, to Hong Kong and, the Orient, you had such gumption
Now you, are trading stocks, without Excel, a Luddite display
Schmatta, was easier
Your life is okay

From time to time, you say to me,
The game last night, did you hear Roxy?
I know you’re proud, he knows the score
But so do I, I know much more!
I’ve hockeyed pucks! I’ve touched a down!
Your life is okay!

My Dad’s, a man of taste
Caramel sauce, a salad from Hy’s
All else, is ‘meh’ or ‘waste’
Except for Ann, she’s quite the prize
I think you should get hitched
Get her a ring – so says Beyonce
Give up, this bachelor life
Your life’s been okay

So here’s to you Dad! My favorite guy!
My favourite grouch, still young and spry!
I know this song, is not for you!
Your wedding toast, was awful too!
Everyone here, let’s give a cheer!
Your life’s been okay!
Yes, it’s been okay!